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Jan 24, 2015
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Polygamy Lectures by NY Cleric Ibn Muneer: It Is Healthy Competition for Women, "Major Jihad" to Fight Jealousy; Problem With Her Faith If She Says "No" to Having Co-Wife; Man Is Weak If He Asks Her Permission to Marry Another

#7067 | 10:49
Source: The Internet - "Imam Ibn Muneer on YouTube"

This clip is a compilation of lectures and statements made by New York cleric Mufti Muhammad Ibn Muneer on the subject of polygamy that were uploaded to the Internet. In a Q&A session that was uploaded on February 1, 2019, Ibn Muneer said that polygamy is "healthy competition" for women because they must make sure their "game is tight" and that it's a sign of weakness if a man asks permission from his first wife to marry a second wife. Ibn Muneer said that women must avoid acting "petty" and scornful regarding their husband's other wives. In a different Q&A session that was uploaded on January 30, 2019, Ibn Muneer discussed women who say that polygamy is not for them, saying: "It is what it is… Do you submit to the legislation of Allah or not? Period." He explained that women used to be happy to have a co-wife around to help them or to tend to the man's wounds and clean his bloody armor when he returns from Jihad. In a video that was uploaded on December 25, 2016, Ibn Muneer said that marrying a second wife is a means for men to protect their chastity and that it is a "major Jihad" for women to fight their jealousy of their co-wives and make themselves smaller to the "bigger picture" of Islam and shari'a. In the first video in a three-part series of videos titled "Polygamy in Light Of Kitaab and Sunnah," which was uploaded on January 24, 2015, Mufti Ibn Muneer said that the opinion that polygamy is bad is the result of the assertion of Western moral values on conquered peoples. He also said there is something wrong with a Muslim woman's faith if she tells her husband to not get a second wife. In the second video in the series, which was uploaded on February 1, 2015, Ibn Muneer said that polygamy causes women to look their best, prepare the best food, and prepare baths for their husbands no matter how miserable they are feeling since they are in constant competition with other wives. He said: "You cannot do what you want to do [or] say what you want to say to your husband because there are other people involved." Ibn Muneer, whose full name is Muhammad Ibn Muneer AbdulHameed, was born in Philadelphia in 1984 to Muslim convert parents. He holds a Master's Degree in Hadith from the Islamic University of Medina. His YouTube channel, Hadith Disciple, has over 11,000 subscribers and almost 2,400 videos, and he has a second YouTube channel, Mufti Q&A, which has over 11,000 subscribers and more than 700 videos. A YouTube video in which Ibn Muneer discusses his story has over 43,000 views, and he recently went on speaking tours in the United Kingdom and Malaysia. Several times a week, he live-streams lectures and Q&A sessions in which he answers questions from viewers from all over the world. He is currently the imam of Ahlis-Sunnah Wal-Jama'ah in Queens, NY. For more from Mufti Ibn Muneer, see MEMRI TV Clips No. 6772 and No. 6894.

Following are excerpts:

 

Mufti Muhammad Ibn Muneer on February 1, 2019: Polygamy is competition for the wives. Anyone who rejects that rejects common sense and logic.

 

[…]

 

From the many wisdoms of polygamy is that it promotes healthy competition

 

[…]

 

[With] another woman in the picture, now she has to fight. There's another household, there's another woman. It's a whole different cuisine. She has to make sure her game is tight. This is the reality.

 

[…]

 

Polygamy is a system. It's not a pick-and-choose… Cherry-pick, I'll take this, but I'll leave off that…

 

[…]

 

If you have to hide it… If you have to lie and cheat to have a second wife, your first wife is totally incompatible with the system of polygamy.

 

[…]

 

Asking permission to take on a second wife proves that you are a weak man. Hiding polygamy from your first wife proves that something is wrong with you as a man. [You should say:] "Listen, sister, I love you, I'll give you all your rights, I give you the time, I give you the necessary love and affection, I'm taking on a second wife. I'm not doing it out of spite, I'm not doing it to hurt you. It's what Allah's and His messenger made permissible. You want to stay? You're welcome to. You can't deal with, it's too much for you? Go with peace."

 

[…]

 

Is it wrong to ask a potentially new wife, or vice versa, for a full STD screen? There's nothing wrong with that.

 

[…]

 

But make sure, sister, that you are asking this question because you're really, truly concerned for his health and for your health.

 

[…]

 

Do not ask this question, do not make this stipulation, because you're trying to make his life a living Hell, and trying to be petty and scornful.

 

[…]

 

On January 30, 2019: There's no need to say "polygyny" because a woman can't marry more than one man. Islamically, the anatomy of her body, her mind, her heart… Nothing in a woman is made to be with another man.

 

[…]

 

It is not a system that is made to be apologetic. It is not a system that is made to pat everyone on the back, and kiss everyone on the hands or the forehead. It is not made to agree with everyone's taste and culture and view and opinion, and nothing in Alalh's religion is like that.

 

[…]

 

It is what it is. Why is it unfair, how could a man, how, how, how… It is what it is. And many women say: "I don't have a problem with it, it's in the Quran, but it's not for me, but but but…" Do you submit to the legislation of Allah or not? Period. There's no other explanation needed. Do you submit to it or not?

 

[…]

 

Don’t you know there was a time in which a woman would congratulate a co-wife, and she would be happy to have a co-wife.

 

[…]

 

That’s someone else to sew and to make the carpets. Someone else to breastfeed children, and carry children, and pick up children, and prepare meals. Someone else to tend to the husband's husbands wounds when he comes home from Jihad, to sew and stitch up that gaping hole in his chest. Someone else that's going to clean and scrub off the armor – the dirt and excrement and the blood off of his armor…

 

[…]

 

Oftentimes, there are people that you would overlook and wouldn't marry, but you may marry them as a second or third wife, and there's no shame in that. There is no shame in that. A sister may say: "I'm not the best sister out there on the market, but I am a good team player." It's a team, you have first… Your starters… It's a reality.

 

[…]

 

On December 25, 2016: As far as having a second wife. First and foremost, you are following the Prophet Muhammad's Sunnah. You are reviving his Sunnah, something that he did, something that he promoted, encouraged, and allowed.

 

[…]

 

Secondly, you are feeding a woman, clothing a woman, taking care of a woman.

 

[…]

 

Anyone that you feed is good, there's a blessing in it.

 

[…]

 

Also, the concept of you getting a second wife - perhaps that's a means of protecting your chsastity and lowering your gaze more.

 

[…]

 

So you are protecting yourself and another woman from fornication.

 

[…]

 

A woman having jealousy, and having envy… A woman feeling like another woman is taking her husband away, invading her turf and her territory, stealing her husband… Especially if a woman comes from a modern, Westernized country, or a secular mindset, [such as] America, the U.K., Canada, Australia, in which the Protestant Anglo-Saxon monogamous lifestyle is predominant…

 

[…]

 

Many women and sisters, whether they're born Muslims, whether they reverted to Islam, whatever the case may be… They have this understanding now, unfortunately.

 

[…]

 

So by you fighting your nafs, and staying in the situation and living in harmony with your husband and co-wives – there lies no doubt, that is a major Jihad.

 

[…]

 

Then it may get even worse when the woman is younger than you, or outwardly more beautiful, or has a better body, or is more attractive and more appealing to him, et cetera. She has more sex appeal than you…. This is a reality. We have to be real when we talk about these things. This is difficult.

 

[…]

 

You fighting those emotions, which are natural, they are put there by nature… You fighting them, you subduing them, you conquering your nafs, you making yourself smaller to the bigger picture of Islam, of the shari'a, of your huband, what Allah allows… There lies no doubt, that is major Jihad.

 

[…]

 

On January 24, 2015: How they dictate the concept of polygamy, the average Muslim is going to blindly follow. Their idea and their concept of polygamy - polygamy is good, polygamy is bad… According to what the master says, and that is unfortunate. It is well-known in history that conquered people are not only afflicted with having their bodies and their lands conquered, but also their minds.

 

[…]

 

And in many, many Muslims cultures, if a man wants to get a second wife, his family members will look at him as if he made an act of disbelief.

 

[…]

 

And many Muslims, unfortunately… I've seen this and dealt with this first hand, with many people, helped people out… They would prefer to commit fornication, God forbid.

 

[…]

 

And they come up with every excuse in the book not to have more than one wife. And that is extreme, that is wrong.

 

[…]

 

And then we have a small group of Muslims who say that polygamy is a part of the religion of Islam.

 

[…]

 

That is the correct understanding. Polygamy is from the religion.

 

[…]

 

It’s a good thing to do. The starting place is that it is the Sunnah of the best of creation, the Prophet Muhammad. Allah's chosen slave and messenger had more than one wife. His companions, who are the best of mankind, the best of any human being that’s ever walked the face of the Earth after the Prophet – they married more than one woman.

 

[…]

 

"That is dirty, you can't have more than one wife, you can't have a wife of this age, you can't have a wife, so on and so forth…" [They] dictate to you your belief system and your culture. [They] come to your land, conquer your land, rape, steal, murder, plunder, pillage, destroy your natural resources, put in charge corrupt people that will keep your country in years and years of debt and turmoil and suffering, and [they] offer you [their] "civilized" way of life.

 

[…]

 

That right there is a very, very sick ideology, and if a Muslim doesn't open his eyes and wake up, and pay attn, something is seriously wrong.

 

[…]

 

You cannot have two wives if you are unstable. If you are physically weak, if you cannot please your first wife and you cannot handle the responsibilities of the first wife, then you can't get a second wife. So we see that polygamy has rules. And similarly, we say to the sisters: The man is treating you kindly, he's giving you your rights, he's doing what he has to do according to the Quran and Sunnah – it is not for you to say: "Don't get another wife, I'll leave you if you get another wife, give me a divorce…" No. No woman of faith is going to say that. No way.

 

[…]

 

No believing woman is going to go against Allah's shari'a.

 

[…]

 

The problem now is when your husband is fulfilling our rights, giving you everything that you need and more, and you still say no. Then there is something wrong with your faith.

 

[…]

 

On February 1, 2015: We also have concept of women being ungrateful to their husbands, as the messenger of Allah told the women in the hadith.

 

[…]

 

He said: "Give charity, because I've been shown that you will be the majority of the denizens of the [Hell]fire.

 

[…]

 

You are ungrateful to good treatment. You do not respect and you do not appreciate your husband's kind treatment of you."

 

[…]

 

This is the truth. When a woman becomes angry, becomes upset, or when her husband doesn’t do something how she wants, she says: "You don’t do anything for me. You never help me out. You're never there for me."

 

[…]

 

This is an unfortunate characteristic of a woman. So therefore, the concept of a woman having a man who comes homes every night, every day, they're together all the time… There lies no doubt that this is a means of ungratefulness.

 

[…]

 

The more you have something and the more easy the access is to that thing, the less appreciation there is. So therefore the concept of, if a woman wants to disrespect her husband, or to censure him, whatever the case may be… There lies no doubt that if he has another wife, if there's another household that he's going to, there's another woman that he's caring for and loving, and she's cooking for him and this and tha… No matter how wretched the woman may be, or miserable, or whatever the case may be, at least she is going to think twice before she says something to anger him or to disrespect him.

 

[…]

 

When a man is coming from his second wife, or going to his second wife, the believing woman… There is no doubt she has the concept of him going to another woman, coming from another woman. [She thinks:] "I need to look in the best fashion, my hair should be done, I should be dressed in the best way, I should be smelling the best way, his food and meals should be prepared, his bath…" And so on and so forth.

 

[…]

 

There is no excuse, there is no "I can't." Therefore, when a woman has another wife or two wives and they are all competing with her, there lies no doubt that from the jealousy of a woman, and sometimes from the malice of a woman, and from the venom of a women, God forbid, is that she is going to try to become number one.

 

[…]

 

Now, you cannot do what you want to do, you cannot say what you want to say to your husband because there are other people involved.

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