Fear and loathing stalks the halls of power in Washington, D.C. The fate of the giant "Self-Licking Ice Cream Cone" (SLICC) hangs in the balance.
That term, for those who are unfamiliar with it, dates at least from the 1990s and referred initially to the U.S. Defense Department and NASA.[1] It was a type of military short-hand to describe how programs and processes develop a life of their own where a system exists for no other reason than to perpetuate itself. In such a scenario, measures of success are created to accomplish the most important goals – not necessarily to achieve a real outcome – but to keep the entity funded and growing. The bureaucracy and its processes exist to keep doing what they have always done, and this inertia is powerful. Large bureaucracies are resistant to change.[2]
While much has been written about Elon Musk and the Department of Government Efficiency (DOGE), what the Trump Administration seems to be trying to do is far broader and more ambitious, an attempt at reversing an irreversible trajectory, radical reform in the way the U.S. government functions both domestically and globally. The odds are daunting, for it turns out that there is not just one SLICC out there, but many.
Although they may overlap to some extent, five big SLICCs can be seen at work today:
The Budget SLICC
The Personnel SLICC
The Implementing Partner SLICC
The Globalism SLICC
The Regional SLICC
The Budget SLICC is, obviously the budgeting and spending process (so this is the original one, as the term was first used to refer to DOD and NASA appropriations and spending in 1991-1992). While Congress appropriates the money, there is a lot of discretion within the executive branch over the budgeting and spending process, a lot of wiggle room. In the summer of 2024, we saw the Biden Administration spend at least $230 million for a Gaza pier to nowhere.[3] Good government advocates often cite egregious examples of waste, fraud and abuse but, of course, there is plenty of spending which is not very smart or helpful that manages to avoid the legal definitions of waste and fraud. Anyone who sat through DOD PowerPoint presentations – as I did back in the day – on Afghanistan knew that spending was occurring that was perfectly legal but which was deceptively being presented as a success. A trillion dollars later, you had the fall of Kabul.[4] But if you are the one who writes the measures of success, almost everything you are measuring – your metrics – will look successful.[5] The Trump people trying to get their hands on ongoing, often opaque, spending in areas such as foreign assistance, is a logical step.
The Personnel SLICC is, of course, the people who staff the bureaucracy. Here one recalls Robert Conquest's Second Law of Politics (or John O'Sullivan's First Law, which is identical): "Any organization not explicitly right-wing sooner or later becomes left-wing." Based on my experience in government, there is little doubt that many American civil servants lean left or liberal. It depends on the organization, of course, but the bias is there (less "liberal" institutions like DOD have their own biases).[6] Some might say that personal political views do not matter as long as the work is done. And yet, during the first Trump Administration, USAID officials attempted to block Trump Administration policy on Iraq to the extent that it became – with liberal spin, of course – a matter of public record.[7] There were many other examples which got less attention. A Trump review of both spending and personnel is also not just about what is being spent and who is overseeing it but also examining if there are cost savings to be made in what seems to be to many Americans a bloated, unresponsive and arrogant bureaucracy at a time of runaway budget deficits.
The Implementing Partner SLICC is a whole ecosystem of NGOs, groups, and organizations relying on government funding to implement certain programs and policies. Often there is a revolving door between government employees (who overwhelmingly share similar worldviews) and the implementing organization. Over time a symbiotic relationship develops involving both personnel and money. The result is liberal government funds liberal private entities for liberal causes. If there is any accountability, it comes from the liberal bureaucracy. The result is, to use the quaint British term, the creation of "Quangos," or Quasi-Autonomous Non-Governmental Organizations, funded by taxpayers but part of an internal, semi-permanent network of political cronies advancing inexorably certain favored causes. Here also you have private entities also carrying out policies that would invite greater scrutiny if done by government. The growth in recent years of the so-called "Disinformation Industrial Complex" in both the US and UK is a perfect example, with ostensibly private organizations – but government funded or influenced – curbing speech or enforcing speech codes in ways that government might not be able to get away with otherwise.[8]
The Globalism SLICC is merely the international dimension of the three previous emanations, the network of international or multinational entities, such as the United Nations Organization or International Criminal Court that have grown up over time and metastasized into a constellation of new anti-American stars. If the international system or the so-called liberal international order was an invention of the United States, or often at the service of the United States, in the post-war period since 1945, it has now often been turned against American interests, with adversaries or obstacles to US policy often funded, at least in part, with American money. Redefining and reorienting America's position toward this system, establishing new benchmarks and redlines, seems like a logical step for an America First nationalist policy agenda.
The Regional SLICC is a straitjacket of our own creation that oriented U.S. policy, resources, and attention towards certain regions – one thinks of Europe and the Middle East – trapping us in a tired scenario of diminishing political returns while marginalizing other areas. The Middle East is important, it is also the world's most dysfunctional region. Europe is important but is both wealthy (at least for now) and imploding. That the U.S. under Trump may finally and truly pivot not just towards Asia, but to Latin America, and even Africa is a realization that things must change and that we cannot do everything (and that our allies can do much more).[9] "He who attempts to defend everything, defends nothing," as Frederick the Great once said.
Two-thirds of Americans believe that government "corruption, inefficiency and red tape" are major problems and want change although they do not fully trust those who want to bring it about.[10] The overwhelming majority of the American people are also unhappy with the status quo, according to Gallup, and have been so for quite a while.[11] The Trump Administration's attempt to address these five areas, to radically reform government operations, including personnel, to cut off the Quango gravy train, to reorient itself – our foreign, economic, and security policy – more realistically, both internationally and regionally, is extremely ambitious. It will not be easy to accomplish and certainly, in its scope, dwarfs anything attempted by an administration in terms of drastic reform for many decades. For many that prospect will be either exhilarating or terrifying.
*Alberto M. Fernandez is Vice President of MEMRI.
[1] Worden, S. Pete (1992). "On Self-Licking Ice Cream Cones." Proceedings of the seventh Cambridge workshop on cool stars, stellar systems, and the sun. ASP Conference Series. Vol. 26. Astronomical Society of the Pacific. pp. 599-603.
[2] Arstechnica.com/science/2022/05/how-nasa-finally-melted-its-giant-self-licking-ice-cream-cone, May 23, 2022.
[3] Thenewhumanitarian.org/analysis/2024/07/16/us-gaza-pier-close-after-costing-230-million-days-worth-aid, July 16, 2024.
[4] Responsiblestatecraft.org/2021/10/04/how-the-self-licking-ice-cream-cone-prolonged-the-20-year-war, October 4, 2021.
[5] Irregularwarfare.org/articles/learning-from-failure-afghanistan-as-a-microcosm-for-strategic-competition, January 4, 2024.
[6] Theamericanconservative.com/mattis-one-more-general-for-the-self-licking-ice-cream-cone, January 8, 2019.
[7] Propublica.org/article/how-mike-pences-office-meddled-in-foreign-aid-to-reroute-money-to-favored-christian-groups, November 6, 2019.
[8] Cato.org/commentary/beginning-end-censorship-industrial-complex, March 20, 2024.
[9] Providencemag.com/2024/08/securing-a-core-group-of-near-east-allies-to-counter-iran/?fbclid=IwY2xjawIIZAdleHRuA2FlbQIxMQABHTJYeQyczUCVU37dKM1IG7XxqRhp3RCUSKvPv9lCLekyrfKghmS5VoP53w_aem_q__OV2JphnefhWQTkXa_bA, August 19, 2024.
[10] Apnews.com/article/doge-musk-trump-corruption-government-efficiency-16243280f446ea85ef50ff106c7e2841, January 24, 2025.
[11] News.gallup.com/poll/1669/general-mood-country.aspx, accessed January 31, 2025.